


Scheming: A Summary

by revenblue



Series: [collection] A Pun Is Its Own Reword [2]
Category: Phineas and Ferb
Genre: Feghoot, Gen, Monologue, POV First Person
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-05
Updated: 2017-10-05
Packaged: 2019-01-09 10:10:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 312
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12274272
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/revenblue/pseuds/revenblue
Summary: Heinz Doofenshmirtz explains his schemes. By which he means he monologues.





	Scheming: A Summary

**Author's Note:**

> Behold, the effort of like an hour's work.
> 
> I'm not sorry.

You know, I always prepare my schemes in advance. It's only _proper_ , putting on a good show for my nemesis.

There's the inator, of course. The focal point of the entire event. I work hard on them all, because there's no point in him coming over to thwart a scheme that _doesn't work_ , where's the fun in that? I think he enjoys the self-destruct buttons too - note to self, I'm almost out of those again. I go through them so fast...

And I can't have a scheme without a _monologue_. I tried that once, he didn't like it, just thwarted and ran.

Sometimes I hire backup dancers for a musical number too, but none of them are answering my calls so I had to skip that this time. You'd think they'd pick up, I'm their biggest customer! _And_ I had the best song prepared, it was one about - oh, never mind.

Anywho. Back to my scheme. The most important part, after the inator and the monologue, is of course the trap. He never seems to see them coming. Sometimes I go to the effort to make something _thematically appropriate_ , but usually a rope is enough. He always breaks out though... How rude is that?

Can't forget the staging- I mean, setting. Sometimes it's a nice day, you know? And I _have_ a balcony, why not use it? It's good to get some sunshine sometimes, even if I have to use SPF 120 sunscreen so I don't burn, which is _painful_ by the way, I'd rather get punched in the face again. Not that that doesn't _also_ happen with Perry the Platypus around. Guy can really throw a punch.

Not like you, Pretendy the Practicepus, you're just a stand-in.

Where was I? Oh, that's right!

It's all to prepare for the moment when a small teal intruder comes crashing in tru der window.


End file.
